Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Kill a Commie for Mommy

I don't know about you, but when I hear the national anthem it does not make me want to murder those with whom I disagree. Greene County's illustrious Sheriff Jack Merritt, on the other hand, feels quite differently.

While in Jefferson City to promote a law allowing psychologists to legally dispense prescriptions, Merritt was quoted by the News-Leader with a doosy. After hearing former American Idol contestant, Jason Yeager, sing the national anthem Merritt stated:

"The way I hear Jason sing the national anthem makes you want to go out and kill a communist. If that doesn't make you patriotic, nothing will."

Isn't he the guy who was embroiled in a scandal involving the fondling and photography of a dead woman's tits during an autopsy? A great guy, Sheriff Merritt. A real man's man and a dandy role model for children everywhere. What an idiot. And yet he was elected as Sheriff.

On his way back to Springfield, Merritt took a detour to Springfield's well known gay bar, Martha's Vineyard, where he promptly raped some homosexuals with his military bowie while singing the Star Spangled Banner.

When questioned, he simply laughed and said: "This ain't nothing. You should have seen me stomp the guts out of that fresh litter of puppies last summer. Nothing like the smell of new puppy-guts on a hot asphalt pavement."

(The last two paragraphs aren't true, but they might as well be.)

Someone else was Thinking and noticed this article first, thank goodness.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I don't know anything about this sheriff you mentioned or anything he might be guilty of... but I have no problem with the killing the liberal, democrat, communist, socialist SOB's that live in this country and under it's anthem, but are so blatantly trying to make a mockery of and destroy what's left of our country, not to mention trying to take away every Constitutional RIGHT we have in this country... you know, like freedom of SPEECH!?
(Which you just so freely partook of in your "rant") The US' National Anthem inspires in me the urge to vomit down the necks of people as described above, so I can somewhat relate to the Sheriff you mentioned.

If you don't agree, and if you can't understand it from this 'layman' perspective, then maybe you should be added to the sheriff's list... or at least, your "FAT" @$$ (and your opinion) should be kicked out of the country before you consume any more of the air WE THE [FREE, THANKFUL, PATRIOTIC] PEOPLE have here!

Howzat for an erratic rant, FAT boy?!?