If you regularly follow the tales of Jack, then you will recall that we put a stop to a man beating up his girlfriend/wife near the side of the road. The police were called. Charges filed. Today was the court date. I had to leave my practicum with the fifth graders to testify, which I was glad to do, if it meant stopping the madness.
Low and behold beloved readers, the two lovebirds walked into court hand-in-hand. This time she had no bruises from previous beatings. Normally, the prosecutor would do nothing because the female was uncooperative, but this time there was a witness and so they went ahead without her cooperation. Good for them, says I.
The prosecutor was prepared to go to trail. The man finally plead guilty to what I assume is a lesser charge. Actually, he had several charges and is wanted in other states. That’s a head scratcher. I sat outside the courtroom and read. I didn’t really want to hear the horrible ins and outs of anyone’s lives. I get that enough working with school children. Ultimately, I didn’t have to testify after all.
In the end, this scrawny little shit of a man will continue to beat up on his baby’s momma. (I don’t know if they have kids, but I like the term.) It confounds my heart and head, but I know that it happens everyday. I just accept that fact that I cannot understand why people stay in abusive relationships. (As a side note, boys can be the victims of domestic abuse too.)
I worked with a lady once. She was really a lot of fun to work with. She was involved in a bad relationship. He didn’t beat her, but he cheated on her a lot and I suspect there were a lot of head games on both parts. We sat outside one day, taking a break, and she told me as she sucked down her grit, that she loved him.
“Why do you stay with someone like that,” I asked.
“I don’t know, Jack. I’ve always been like that. The more they treat me like shit, the more I love them.”
Well, screw me running. What do you say to that? That-there needs some serious counseling to fix, and it may never be fixed. There is something you can do, if you or someone you love is being abused.
The National Domestic Abuse Hotline:
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TTY)
Low and behold beloved readers, the two lovebirds walked into court hand-in-hand. This time she had no bruises from previous beatings. Normally, the prosecutor would do nothing because the female was uncooperative, but this time there was a witness and so they went ahead without her cooperation. Good for them, says I.
The prosecutor was prepared to go to trail. The man finally plead guilty to what I assume is a lesser charge. Actually, he had several charges and is wanted in other states. That’s a head scratcher. I sat outside the courtroom and read. I didn’t really want to hear the horrible ins and outs of anyone’s lives. I get that enough working with school children. Ultimately, I didn’t have to testify after all.
In the end, this scrawny little shit of a man will continue to beat up on his baby’s momma. (I don’t know if they have kids, but I like the term.) It confounds my heart and head, but I know that it happens everyday. I just accept that fact that I cannot understand why people stay in abusive relationships. (As a side note, boys can be the victims of domestic abuse too.)
I worked with a lady once. She was really a lot of fun to work with. She was involved in a bad relationship. He didn’t beat her, but he cheated on her a lot and I suspect there were a lot of head games on both parts. We sat outside one day, taking a break, and she told me as she sucked down her grit, that she loved him.
“Why do you stay with someone like that,” I asked.
“I don’t know, Jack. I’ve always been like that. The more they treat me like shit, the more I love them.”
Well, screw me running. What do you say to that? That-there needs some serious counseling to fix, and it may never be fixed. There is something you can do, if you or someone you love is being abused.
The National Domestic Abuse Hotline:
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TTY)
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3 comments:
Jack,
Those are very sad cases. How twisted is a view of love when it requires one to hurt them? It breaks my heart every time I see it. I have worked with ladies that feel the same way. They usually believe they are not worthy of someone treating them properly. It reinforces my constant teaching of my daughter that she is person of value.
Jack, thanks for trying to help. In my line of work I see this all the time. Do you know the average number of times an abused woman leaves her abuser before she is gone for good? Something like 20. 20! And some poor women don't make it that long before the abuser goes on to kill them.
And yes, it happens to men, too.
It is sad to see someone like your coworker with the insight to know that they love someone the more they treat them badly, but not the strength, skills, or knowledge to know how to change it.
First, Jack, thank you for stepping up and doing the right thing here. I've helped out with ministries pulling women out of abusive situations and sexual slavery and it's amazing how strong those bonds can be between a prostitute and pimp or abuser and abused.
As long as people like you continue to stand up I have faith that those in real need will get the help.
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