As Valentine's Day approaches, I have to write something about love and romance, but the truth is I'm not so much the romantic. Mushy gushy, schmoopy slop ain't my way. I do buy Skinny Kitty plenty of jewelry to keep her happy and I have sent flowers, and I tell my sweetie I loves her – cause I do.
But don't be expecting any romantic love songs from this writer. I will, however, provide you some twisted looks at romance with Cracked.com's comedic love song tribute entitled "8 Romantic Songs You Didn't Know Were About Rape".
You can bet your sweet candy heart that Chris Hansen will get a woody over these love ballads.