AARP SUPPORTS HEALTH CARE REFORM; IS IT REALLY AS BAD AS THEY SAY?

I heard a TV show host asking some questions of a Congressman who was against all of this socialist health care reform and it made sense to me.

If you are against health care reform because it is socialist, then you are against Medicare and Social Security, too. They are national socialist programs?

Those programs (with huge voting blocks) was okay. He supports them.

If you had been around during the times these programs were being voted upon then would you have supported them?

He would have voted for those socialist programs.

What's the difference?

And I think it would behoove us all to back up and realize that some national plan is not the devil. We have them now and they protect millions of people. In the case of national health care, the public is being duped into believing all kinds of lies about the program.

In this case, the media is feeding into the frenzy and refusing to meet their mission by writing stories that directly address the issue. That is to say, the media is covering the town hall screaming matches in spades, but the institution is not sending out their brightest and best investigative reports to read the bill, get the facts and publish those facts (good, bad or indifferent) so the public can learn the realities of the proposed plan and make an informed decision.

It's crazy.

Are you against health care for everyone? Are you also against Medicare and Social Security? What's the difference, really? Why would we not want health care for everyone? That would benefit small businesses and help them compete for quality employees against the big corporations. It really makes sense. Assuming it is done right. Who would know because the media is covering the sensational fights and not the issue.

Even the AARP supports health care for everyone and I don't think anyone would consider the AARP some left-wing think tank. It's not an evil concept despite what Sarah Palin thinks or says.

Jane Wiley, state director for AARP in South Carolina wrote this article for The Greenville News. In it, she debunks some myths and misconceptions. Here is a run-down of her points:

1. AARP has not endorsed any health care bill.
2. House and Senate plans state employer-sponsored health care will remain in place.
3. Reform will provide health care to those who lose their jobs (and their employer-sponsored health care) as many who lose their jobs cannot afford COBRA.
4. "Nothing in current proposals would let government override your doctor's judgment about your treatment."
5. The bill ensures elderly persons' wishes are respected.
   
6. "Comparative effectiveness research" will not hurt care. It is the Consumer Reports of the health care industry and gives patients the chance to review research and discover which practices have the most effective treatments.
   
7. Those covered by health care will also benefit. If passed, those who are 65+ and on Medicare Part D will see a cut in costs "for brand name drugs by half once you reached the 'doughnut hole' or Part D coverage gap. Other parts of the bills being debated would close the 'doughnut hole' entirely over time." That's good for elderly persons.
   
8. No more denial of coverage because of pre-existing conditions. That's a good thing for millions of people with diabetes.
   
9. AARP will fight any legislation that proposes to slash, cut, burn, or hurt benefits for seniors.
   
10. Without reform, health care is more costly
    

Perhaps, just perhaps, the public is being playing the fools by being tricked that health care reform is an evil plot to kill all the seniors. If AARP is on board with health care reform, then maybe there is something good really going on that Rush Limbaugh doesn't want us to see.

REMEMBERING JFK's SISTER

This headline brought to you from the good folks at The Today Show (Aug. 14), who apparently decided that Eunice Kennedy Shriver, founder of Special Olympics and advocate for a life of service, did not have a significant enough legacy to warrant her own headline. She had to be labeled as JFK's sister.

WHO IS YOUR HERO?

I have successfully managed to watch all three seasons of HEROES this summer, which took some doing. Now I am geared up to watch season 4 (Redemption) beginning Sept. 21. I have really enjoyed the summer-long HEROES marathon and found myself caught up in the drama of the show.

Mostly, I am enamored with the switching of sides the characters go through. I have watched people who were often doing what they thought was right in the most maddening and destructive (and evil) way. Some were aware of their evil intentions but others were not until it was too late. Even Sylar had his moments of attempted redemption. It was the transformative nature of the characters that kept me watching.

The new season will focus on two main storylines: 1) the characters from seasons 1-3 trying to live normal lives and 2) a look at new powered characters who have lived among us as carnival attractions all this time and are now ready to come onto scene.

Newsarama reported seeing footage at San Diego Comicon of Claire kissing her female college roommate; who knows if that will make it into the show or not. Poor Claire has had a hard way to go and she is, understandably, confused and angry. She’s in some need of finding her real self.

HEROES is one of the best shows on television, in my opinion anyway, and season 4 would likely be a great jumping on point, considering the introduction of new characters and a new storyline for the established ones.

The HEROES comics are also in line for a new season. I haven’t picked up any of them, but they are available in hardcover at most comic shops. I’d like to have those.

HEROES
Season 4: Redemption
Two-hour premiere
Monday, September 21
8 pm

ALBERTO GONZALES HIRED TO TEACH AT TEXAS TECH

Former (and mostly disgraced) US Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez has been hired as a visiting professor at the Texas Tech University political science department.

Apparently his hiring has occurred mostly under the radar with little strife or upheaval as compared to other politicians who have transferred to the world of academia.

Gonzalez will be paid $100,000, according to the Chronicle of Higher Education, to teach one "junior-level course on the executive branch, deliver guest lectures, and help recruit first-generation and minority students."

THE PAPER CAN DO BETTER

Nick Ibarra, Springfield Zone 1 Councilperson, wrote a LTTE today. Finally someone wants to have professional discussion about something other than religion. He even provided footnotes to substantiate his claims.

But ...

As I got to the bottom of the LTTE I found no citations (online edition). There weren't any footnotes, although his letter clearly lists them as footnotes and numbers them sequentially. Damn that newspaper! Why would they not publish those footnotes? Our paper makes me so angry sometimes.

While I don't necessarily agree with Ibarra's stance, I find his approach in this situation is refreshing.

THE BIG BAD LIBERAL MEDIA

For years the right wing has complained that the media is biased against conservatives. I offer this perspective: The Birthers conspiracy theory. The news keeps hounding the president about his birth certificate, writing stories on the subject in the face of numerous verifications otherwise. They just won't leave it alone.

According to the Springfield News-Leader, Obama's live birth in Hawaii has been substantiated:

• A copy of Obama's birth certificate has been produced by Hawaii.
• Hawaii has completed numerous verifications to ensure the president meets those pesky "constitutional requirements" to be the head bucko in charge.
• Hawaii reiterated just last week it's contention that Obama was, indeed, born in the island-state on August 4, 1961.
• FactCheck.org also maintains he was born in the US.

How much more do we really need as proof? At this point, some people are so intent on hating him (which I cannot help wondering if it is due to his race as much as much his politics in many cases, although that is simply speculation on my part) that Obama producing his own document will do nothing. Already lawyers have claimed that the birth certificate produced by Hawaii is a fake. They will simply do the same if he produces one. It's a no win for Obama, so there's really no point.

As if the entire state of Hawaii is out to deceive us all. It's all a little bit crazy. I think the people who tend to believe that are also the ones who fall prey to the religious fantacism linking Obama's name with the Antichrist.

Despite the facts – the birth certificate produced by Hawai and the verification by FactCheck.org – the conservtives continue their cause, clogging up the legal system with ridiculous lawsuits and costing the taxpayers all kinds of money and getting all kinds of press against the president.

And I wonder: How does this coverage continue when the media is so biased toward the liberals?

CHOCOLATE-COVERED BACON FAVORITE FAIR FOOD

You might think humor blog, Fair City News, cooked up the above headline, but this food is for real, kids. A new delicacy of the fair/carnival/circus circuit includes chocolate-covered bacon. It's not too new. Some fairs had it last year, but it's gaining steam this year,with more and more news outlets talking about it. I heard it on Bob & Tom this morning and knew I had to blog about it.

Will the Ozark Empire Fair carry the delicacy? I don't want to know. Even this fat guy has his limits and chocolate-covered bacon is it. No thank you. I'd rather eat a piece of celery.

HE SAYS IT WITH A STRAIGHT FACE, TOO

Not Right About Anything brings us news from the religious right (WorldNetDaily, the same folks who brought us the Birther's idiocy) that claim Jesus may very well have given us a clue as to who the Antichrist might be.

Be sure you are sitting down for this one, kids.

Satan: Your name is Baraq Bama!

That means Barack Obama is the Son of Perdition, the Lawless One, The Beast, TThe Enemy, The Adversary, The Assyrian, The Spoiler, The Nail, The Little Horn, The Profane and Wicked Prince of Israel, The Idol Shepherd.

For the love of all that is holy and good, what have we done!

I tried several times to write a synopsis of the argument, but I just couldn't manage it. Something about taking the words of Jesus (Aramaic) and translating them to Greek and then to Hebrew and voila, we might possibly be able to label Barack Obama as the possible Antichrist. They claim the facts are indisputable. It's just such silly drivel. You will just have to watch the video yourself.



Anyway, these folks are providing some kind of serious argument (wrapped in the most ridiculous pseudo-scholarship) that our president may indeed be the Antichrist.

This is what people are spending their time on? What about the economy, the on-going war, health care, poverty, civil rights, or any other host of serious issues facing our country and religion? Can't we focus our time on that?

It's just a matter of time before someone from our area claims this truth from Jesus' mouth on the Springfield News-Leader opinion page, and the letter will get published as legitamite discourse to enhance the civic engagement in the public domain. Perhaps it will be an "Our Voice". I can't wait.

I'll tell you what is indisputable: This was created and supported by persons who call themselves Christians. So much for scholarship.

Judas Priest!

TAXING FATTY FOODS ON THE HORIZON

The LA Times reports that taxes on unhealthy foods may be on the horizon, put in place to combat obesity, obesity-related co-morbidities, and to pay for universal health care. The report cites a study released that looks at obesity policies gained from the tobacco war experiences.

Taxing fatty foods is a pretty narrow policy and does little to adequately combat obesity, which is, in this fat boy's mind, a serious problem of epidemic proportions. Projections state that our life expectancy is going down.

A comprehensive plan should include:

• Insurance-covered, physician-monitored weight loss programs paid for by insurance.
• Insurance-covered mental health services to deal with overeating issues.
  
• Seeing overeating as an addiction and treating it as such.
• Weight loss surgery approved after physician-monitored weight loss programs become inadequate.
• Making healthy food affordable.

Putting the fork down is not enough. Many people do not understand that overeating is an addiction and is a very powerful one. Talking with a professional counselor specializing in food addiction makes a significant difference. It did with me and the techniques for combating overeating are amazingly simple. It's not a head shrink or delve-into-your-past kind of counseling session, by the way.

Taxing sodas, Ding Dongs, Ho-Hos, McGarbage, Taco Death, and other fast food restaurants would also help. I'm okay with that. We shouldn't make it easy for big companies to hook people on addictive foods and keep them addicted. If you have ever bought only healthy food, you know what your food bill looks like. It's high. I know because I buy a lot of produce, organic foods, and no sugar foods.

I also stopped drinking soda, which was an easy fix for me, but it is not easy for everyone. Caffeine is also addictive. For many folks, not drinking soda can make a significant weight loss change. I only drank diet and not much of that, but I've quit diet, too. Plain iced tea, water and skim milk make up the bulk of my liquids. I also exercise 30-40 minutes three times a week.

It would also be nice if the corn industry did not promote high fructose corn syrup as a healthy food source. Judas Priest!

IS THERE SUCH A THING AS TRUTH?

The great philosopher's have asked the "absolute truth" question for thousands of years. I don't expect to write anything prophetic on the subject here. I merely attempt to give my own perspective as it stands at 1:18 p.m. on Wednesday, July 29. My ideas continue to evolve as I reflect internally and discuss externally and so this writing only stands true at this moment in time. I cannot predict how my thoughts will evolve in the next few minutes, or the next few decades.

I used to believe in absolute truth. That there was, somewhere out there, the perfect answer to every question; absolute right and absolute wrong; black and white realities, universal truths that will always stand. I suppose I haven't really abandoned that thought, but I am shedding my dogmatic beliefs in art, truth, and God. That is to say, I am not convinced that humans have reached a point where we can identify those absolute truths.

This all started with a discussion about Bob Ross. Over the weekend, some friends and I sat around my porch and talked about the definition of art and if Bob Ross was an artist, a hack, or a merely a participant in craft. Is there such a thing as a concrete definition of art? My boiled down answer was this:

Art cannot be defined so clearly. We can determine characteristics of great art, but that true art is really defined by the individual and not the establishment. Something like that.

My friend Paul argued that art must be transformative and have a message and that art is also defined by the intention of the artist. He also believes the notion that there is absolute truth and that we can discover it.

I think there may be absolute truth out there, but that we really have no way to discover it as a society. We can merely find our own personal truth. I think what is true for me may not be true for you, and that we can look upon the same scene, same issue, or same circumstance and come to different conclusions.

For Christians, we look to God and the Bible for guidance and inspiration and for our path. However, it is clear that even within the Christian belief system, there are drastically different paths and approaches to God. Some are minor and some are significant. Sometimes what I deem a minor and inconsequential detail is a significant and defining criteria for Christians.

An example includes my grandmother and her church. Her denomination believes that communion must be taken every Sunday and that everyone must drink from a single cup. My church takes communion every Sunday but we use individual cups. My childhood Baptist church only took communion at Christmas and Easter (as best I recall). For me, the procedure is inconsequential. For my grandmother's church, it means the difference between salvation and eternal flames.

For some all abortions are always wrong, regardless of the situation. For others, there are some circumstances where abortions are permitted, but they are rare. Still others find that abortions are always a personal choice of the individual.

The truth depends on an individual's point of view, history, and belief system. If one approaches the situation from a literal biblical perspective, then one might argue that the Bible is the absolute truth. That's merely a person's opinion and it is not, as of yet anyway, an arguable fact. applicable to all persons. It is a belief. Perhaps it is true and perhaps it is not. We really don't know for sure beyond what our conscience and belief system tell us.

If there is absolute truth, then I don't think it is possible for our society to discover that truth. Part of me is contemplating the idea that there are multiple ways to seek and find truth or God or both, and that different approaches may all be acceptable so long as one follows his or her own true path.

HEROES PANEL @ SAN DIEGO COMICON

There was a packed house (according to this report) at the HEROES panel at Comicon. The freakshow will continue for another season, this time with our favorite characters getting a chance to settle down and try to figure out what a normal life is all about. New characters from a carnival will show up. Claire will be in college, doing what we dream co-eds doing.

Sounds interesting. Now that I have season two down and have started three, I'm hoping to finish before the start of the next season. I have to get to work this last week. I'll let you know how it goes. With lots of TV watching, I will have to carve out time to get in my daily exercise otherwise the fat doctor will chastise me.

Gosh, I guess I should read, too. Reading is fundamental, don't you know.

I HAD HALF

Tonight, we went out to eat with grandma. I ate half: half of the fajita burrito, half of the chips, half of the rice, half of the beans. I even ate only half of the chips. I was still hungry when I quit, but I waited and soon my belly told my brain that it was full. By the time I left I felt full, almost too full if you can imagine that. I can barely imagine it myself.

The weight loss program I am in is a lot of work, takes a lot of time, requires a lot of energy, but I think it is paying off. I lost two more pounds last week. It's slow enough but I can see progress although it feels like a grudge match some of the time. Tonight was easy.

I'm even wondering if I could have eaten less than I did. I think eating half may have been too much, but I will cross that burning bridge another day. For now, I will celebrate my eating half.

HOW'S YOUR GARDEN, MARY?

We've made attempts to grow gardens before, with disappointing results. I'd almost given up hope for my thumb. Then the wife found the Earthbox. Our onions did terrible, all but one dead, but all is not lost. The peppers are doing fine as are the cucumbers, squash and cantaloupe. I don't think we've recouped the money we spent, like many claim, but we have had fresh, organic produce.

The summer isn't over yet, either. I'm hoping it really gets going soon, exploding with fruit. The squash, cucumbers and cantaloupe have blossoms a plenty so I anticipate some good eating very soon. I did notice our first cantalope today. It's a cute little guy, about the size of a Nerf baseball.

If it all works out well, I may purchase more Earthboxes next year and plant me some maters. I have decided to forget the poblano peppers from now on. It's easier to buy them in the store. I'll replace them with more red, yellow or orange bell peppers.

COX HOSPITAL BANS EMPLOYEE SMOKING BEYOND IT'S BORDERS

According to Kathleen O'Dell's story in the Springfield News-Leader, Cox Hospital is kicking in it's most aggressive anti-smoking policies to date. Here is the breakdown as I understand them:

• Employees are banned from smoking within 500 feet of all Cox facilities during shifts and lunch breaks. This includes banned smoking on property not owned by Cox.
• Employees are banned from tobacco use anywhere (on duty or not) when wearing an official hospital badge, uniform, or any other clothing provided by Cox.
• Employees with who stink of smoke (clothing, hair, etc.) will be may be sent home on their own time to change.
• The disciplinary action will be progressive but can end in termination.
  

That is serious policy. In my mind, I cannot see how Cox can dictate to employees what they can do on their own time or when off hospital property. Although public schools utilize similar practices and teachers have lost their jobs for acts done at home or in public. It's basically a professional behavior clause written into the contracts.

I haven't decided how I feel about the "while in uniform" policies. That might be more enforceable as the employees are representing the hospital in some capacity.

I do think the hospital is on solid ground with its odor policy. Odor allergies are becoming very common and some places are starting to ban colognes, perfumes, and other strong smells. Be it body odor, perfume or cigarette smoke, patients should not be forced to pay to endure others' stinky smells. If I were the hospital I would specifically write the policy to include any offensive odors, not just cigarette smoke.

I do believe that people have the right to chose smoking. It's not healthy or smart, but neither is being fat. However, I do not think that smokers have the right to expose the general public to their smoking habits as that second hand and third hand smoke does affect the health of others.

LORD OF THE FLINGS

We hosted a trebuchet weekend at our home. Our college friends, most of whom have elementary-aged children, got together Saturday morning until Sunday afternoon. The menfolk took the children and stayed at our home for LORD OF THE FLINGS. (The ladies had a girl's night out. They took some kind of dance instruction.)

The fellers along with the kids (two girls and two boys) built miniature medieval siege weapons – trebuchets and catapults – and fired them into the next door neighbor's yard. Huzzah! It was great fun.

The catapult my daughter and I built.

Each child had an adult mentor. My daughter and I built a trebuchet, but it didn't work too well. Our catapult, on the other hand, was dynamite: powerful, fast and it shot wicked far. Smoke bombs are really fun to shoot.

We instructed the children – nay, we warned them – not to walk in front of the weapons, not to enter the war field when it was hot, and not to lean your face over a cocked and loaded machine. Lesson was well learned when one of the boys put his face over the thing then pulled the trigger.

We figured out a new way to knock out an already loose baby tooth. I told him to quit spitting and let the blood pool in his mouth so I could take pictures just for his mother-the-nurse. I'm a dandy like that.

He wasn't hurt, by the way. Didn't shed a tear.
The miniatures don't really shoot hard at all.

We also read a lot of comic books and ate out twice. Then on Sunday the men-children met up with the mothers at the Close Memorial Park to see the butterfly exhibit, which is really fascinating and free. Oh yeah, we also made boffers swords and fought each other. The kids really liked that.

All in all, it was a really fun weekend, but I was tired afterwards. I think the adults enjoyed the time as much as the kids. I know I did.

Two of us purchased our trebuchet kits from trebuchet.com. They worked very well and were not too expensive.

UNINTERESTED IN HOUSEHOLD CHORES

I accept, as my responsibility, 90% of the household chores in the summer; however, after this weekend I am completely and utterly disengaged in the process of cleanliness. I am more interested in watching HEROES.

The television series, HEROES, is one of my favorite shows. I was able to watch most episodes during the first season but college got in the way of seasons two and three. No way; no how. I have indulged myself this summer. I have finished season one (23 hour-long episodes) and have started season two (11 hour-long episodes because of the writer's strike I think).

Somehow the wife and daughter seem to think that clean floors, washed dished and hot food is also a priority. [sigh] I don't think I am going to change their minds so I should quit blogging and get to it, but I am not inclined to do so.

AVATAR: THE GREATEST CHILDREN’S CARTOON SERIES

For our first summer together, the daughter and I chose to watch the entire AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER series from Nickelodeon. Consistently, the series has gotten better by growing and developing into a fully realized cartoon series.

AVATAR is, in our opinion, simply the best cartoon series for kids ever made. I loved G.I. JOE and THE TRANSFORMERS as a kid, as well as SUPER FRIENDS and other comic stories. However, AVATAR is, from a writing standpoint, far superior to these cult cartoons. The characters are developed, the story lines interconnected, rich with detail, and they [gasp] make sense. Good lucking finding all of those qualities in any cartoon series designed for children and teens.

The story is relevant today and ripe with strong male and female characters (on the good and bad sides). Characters transform throughout the series, gathering wisdom and understanding regardless of the peril it may bring them. It is amazing to me that a children’s show is so complex and deep.

The characters often struggle with right and wrong, between fight and flight, family and destiny. We see them (good and bad characters) struggle with discovering who they are and working to find their own path through life. It is intense and painful at times, but it is a good story for children and adults.

I would go on and on, but I wouldn’t want to spoil the three-season series. Forget about renting it from any brick and mortar store in Springfield. Most don’t carry it and those that do only carry disc one of season one. Netflix, on the other hand, has available every disc of all three seasons – the first season is open for streaming to your computer or television.

AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER is absolutely outstanding and is worthy of the numerous awards it has been nominated for and won. There is a live action movie coming out but the more I have learned about it, the more disappointed I have become. First, they have scrubbed the cultural diversity from the film, making the characters all white, rather than their intended cultures. Secondly, the creators of the series are not involved. I’m not holding my breath.

Avatar on Wikipedia

MORE ON HEALTH CARE

Thanks to an alert Jack operative, I was pointed to some places that rationally support Obama's health care reform bill. I trust the American Medical Association over radio and television entertainment personalities.

Wall Street Journal Letter to the Editor from the AMA
I’d like to share the American Medical Association’s rationale for supporting the House health-care bill (“What’s Up Docs?,” Review & Outlook, July 20). Without a bill that can pass the House, there will be no health reform this year. The House bill is an important starting point. The AMA will stay engaged to improve the final bill for patients and physicians.

Reform of the broken Medicare physician payment formula is necessary to assure long-term access to care for seniors, and its inclusion in the House bill is a huge victory for Medicare patients and their physicians. Its inclusion is one of many reasons the AMA supports the bill. It also establishes a health insurance exchange that would provide a choice of plans to the uninsured, self-insured and small business employees, with voluntary physician participation.

The AMA is committed to achieving health reform this year that will provide all Americans with affordable, high-quality health care. The House bill helps achieve this by extending health-insurance coverage to nearly all Americans and eliminates coverage denials based on pre-existing conditions.

Our position at the center of the health-reform debate is an honor and a serious responsibility. Maintaining the status quo is not an option. The AMA will stay engaged to get meaningful health reform that benefits patients and physicians signed into law this year.

J. James Rohack, MD
American Medical Association President, Chicago

Unfortunately, this letter does not really address the more detailed questions that the opponents have brought up. However, this AMA FAQ for H.R. 3200 is much more detailed and quite helpful. Here are some goodies from it:

Question 1: I have heard that as many at 120 million people will be enrolled in the new public option health plan. Is that true?
AMA Answer 1: No. The nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office has estimated that the bill will ensure that 97% of the legal, non-elderly population will have health insurance. At most, 12 million people would be enrolled in the public plan, representing only about 4% of the entire population. Overall, 37 million uninsured Americans will have health insurance coverage who do not have it now.

Question 2: Won't employers simply drop coverage?
AMA Answer 2: Again, the non-partisan Congressional Budget Office estimates that from 2010 until 2019, the number of Americans with employer provided coverage will increase from 150 million to 162 million people. Additionally, for those Americans who purchase coverage through the Health Insurance Exchange, two-thirds (or 20 million people) will choose private plans. This means a significant increase in the number of American's insured by private insurance plans.

The pdf also addresses rumors such as this health care reform makes insurance illegal, which is erroneous. I need more, especially from those who are opposed and not just because it is Obama's plan. Perhaps an unbiased reader will send us some reputable information from a reputable source regarding the oppositions' side of the issue.

I have heard that public funds will be spent on abortion and that is bound to really cause serious stumbling blocks for some people who would otherwise support national health care. I am sympathetic to that plight. I think that argument is legitimate if it, indeed, proves to be true.

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

Although I find some of his remarks rather interesting, I wish Charles Hedrick and all those who respond to him, would just leave the opinions page alone. I'm tired of the private little feud they are having about religion. Let's talk about authentic issues (not theological ones).

I would like to see more thoughtful, reflective letters. I would like to hear from someone with concrete reasons and documented examples of why Obama's plan won't work or how it will really affect us so badly. I'd like to see the same from someone who can explain exactly how his bill will really work.

Enough condescending letters or rehashed talking points from political nobodies. I want to hear more from the Congressional Budget Office and from the American Medical Association. I haven't heard anything substantial beyond some blogger's rants and restating of Coulter, Mancow or Rush. Thanks, but I'd rather hear more reporting on the health care bill than just getting it from Obama. It's his plan so he's going to put the best foot forward.

Did I miss this great reporting? If so, tell me about it. I would like to know more from serious and unbiased sources. Is this really too much to ask?

A LITTLE MORE WEIGHT LOST

It is slow-going, this weight loss business, but I am keeping my nose to the grindstone. Which reminds me, I need to log my food intake for the day and also get some exercise in. Lost two more pounds at my last weigh in.

THEIR WORDS BETRAY THEM

A family in (you guessed it) Texas posted a sign above their door that reportedly captures their disdain for the illegal immigration problem, and it is a problem. The sign reads:

HISPANICS
KEEP OUT

This family really isn't protesting illegal immigration at all, even though that is what they claim. The Texas family is really prompting their hatred of all persons of Hispanic descent, regardless of those persons's citizenship status. There are plenty of legal Hispanic citizens, American-born citizens of Hispanic descent, and green-card carrying Hispanic immigrants. There are also plenty of lighter-skinned illegal immigrants from outher countries, but the family doesn't put a sign up about that.

This is not about illegal immigration. It is about anger toward those with Mexican blood.

I wish the family would chose to take it down, although I don't think law enforcement should get involved. I do think the commnity has a right to respond so long as it is non violent.

What I really wish is that people were not so filled with anger, hate and discrimination toward people based on their lineage. It's silly.

I can't help it, but I always wonder then are these folks also born again? I've heard it quoted that 80 percent of the US population is Christian.

Keystroke to News2K for he posted it first.

THE PITY-PARTY OF REALITY SHOWS CAN SUCK IT

I'm not fond of the all too common dysfunctional derbies that pit poor person against poor person in a race to see who can garner the most pity from television producers and the populous. I don't see that as contributing to a healthy life too much.

That's right, I am criticizing Extreme Makeover: Home Edition – a post that is spurred on by a local family who is the newest recipient of the show.

My first thought is that this is a family of two adults and six children living in an 800-square foot home. If a family can barely afford an apartment-sized home, how in the world can they begin to afford a luxury 3,300 square foot McMansion? The taxes alone are going to be astronomical compared to what they were. What about maintenance, utilities and insurance?

Is this really a problem for other recipients? I went to the tubes to find out and my suspicion was correct. Other families have lost their homes.

Wall Street Journal story 1
This family saw a 50% increase in their taxes and is facing possible foreclosure.

Wall Street Journal story 2
This woman received a 7,000 square foot home, but it was riddled with numerous code violations. Therefore the city slapped her with a $29,000 lien.

Wall Street Journal story 3
Kentucky family tries to sell 3,300 square foot, $339,900 home. The show only paid the family's existing second mortgage to pay for their adopted son. Medical bills and higher taxes and insurance force a sale.

WSB TV
This family faces foreclosure on a now $450,000 home.


Certainly there is a personal responsibility here on the part of the families. Some of them get a second mortgage to pay for medical bills or a failing business and that can lead to trouble. However, just like banks which should not give out high loans to people who can't afford it, neither should this show give poor and struggling families homes they are utterly unable to financially support. It's setting people up for failure.

It's like giving a family a new HD television, computer and internet service for a year when they don't have indoor plumbing and are facing astronomical medical bills for a child with Autism. It's great, but it doesn't really solve their troubles.

What's wrong with a modest home rather than a McMansion? Why not provide nice accommodations, use the rest of the money to pay all of the family's debts (not just some) and get the family financial counseling? It wouldn't make for such an exciting show, that's why, but it would be a better gift.

I'm happy for the family in Bois D'Arc. I hope they make it and keep the home forever. It is a wonderful gift, but I am concerned about the family's ability to keep this home and the show's tendency to promote pity.

We don't need another Jerry Lewis.

THE 10-STEP PROGRAM TO BEING A SERIAL KILLER

Can you say "dark comedy"?

HOW TO BE A SERIAL KILLER tells the tale of Mike Wilson, a teacher of all things deathly. Together with his apprentice, he instructs us on the basics of killing a lot of people. What's included? How about such topics as: theories on corpse disposal, balancing work and play, practical methods of killing, and planning a getaway.

The trailer makes the movie look like one bloody good film. On July 24 (that's this week) embrace your dark comedian and give it a look-see. I've gotta see this one. Off to the Netflix queue.

CRACKING UP

I offer you a series of funnies from Cracked.com. I love this site and always get a good chuckle when I need one.

• Understanding the Complexities of NASCAR: A Flowchart
• The 5 Stages of Political Excuses
• The 10 Geekiest Pieces of Furniture in the Universe

OH, IT'S A THORN ALRIGHT

Desdinova pointed me to a piece in our local paper regarding race. Sharon Lee Archer of Springfield laments the News-Leader's inability to find white faces to photograph. She's tired, you see, of all the Negros in the paper. She's not a fan of diversity, don't you know. Who here is willing to bet she is also a born again Christian? Just a guess.

That is one thing I really dislike about my annual motorcycle ride to Kentucky. Every year I see T-shirts and hear talk about the n-words doing this and the n-words doing that. It's constant and I am always a bit surprised at the ignorance. I always look forward to coming home and getting away from that. Then there's Ms. Archer. Me thinks she might look into joining crazy Fred Phelps' church of hate and discontent.

DRAMA CAMP

Today was my daughter's first day at her two-week drama camp (as if she needs lessons in drama). She came home beat, which is just how it should be. Keep em moving and grooving, says I. Tomorrow we find out what part she gets to play then we practice, practice, practice. She's also taking guitar lessons (by DVD right now but hopefully from a real live teacher this fall).

900 MILES

I put exactly 900 miles – house-to-hotel – on the motorcycle this weekend (Thursday-Sunday). It was a good time, but things are starting to change at the rally. It's not the same. Growing pains I guess. Still, we had a great time and really enjoyed ourselves and the endless parade of bikes and whatnot. The other guys took lots of pictures but I went without the camera this year. I decided to just sit back and let the festivities happen before my eyes.

Once again the Christian Motorcycle Association was in full force, supplying cold water to all participants. They were especially kind to me and true to form, they never pushed a single piece of theology onto anyone, but gladly offered it to anyone seeking it out.

I'm tired today and even took a 2-hour nap this afternoon (after watching some episodes of the television show, HEROES). I also read some. I did manage to do a load of dishes, fix dinner and clean up afterwards. Such is my contribution to the household today. Not great, but I was really tired.

DOG FOOD: MAKING CHORES A REASON TO WORK OUT

The dog was almost out of food. I could have taken the van or better yet I could have taken the motorcycle. It was a nice day, I hadn't exercised yet so the daughter and I (and one of her neighborhood friends) followed in the footsteps of Carbon Trace and rode our bicycles. Andy, we even tried to follow the rules of the road, stopping at stop signs, not riding on sidewalks (much) and everything.

Took us 15 minutes to get to the pet store – just enough time for this fat guy to catch his breath. We bought our food, dawdled for just a second, then headed back. A 30-minute bike ride worked out quite nicely. The fat doctor will be pleased.

I'm working hard at this weight loss thing. Some days it kicks my butt and other days I teach that fat a thing or two.

A BIKE ON THE WILD SIDE

Dad and I – along with our friends and family – are leaving for the Little Sturgis motorcycle rally this week. The progeny and I spent the afternoon washing and waxing the bike in preparation for the ride.

This is a guy thing so the wives stay home while we pound the street and eat some bugs and dirt. Dad and I always look foward to finding that one piece of biker equipment that we didn't know we were looking for and the dirt drag races. Dudes sign up, hop on their bikes and drag race one another on the dirt track. It's a lot of fun to watch, but there is no way I'd ever get my award winner out there. Heck no! She's way too pretty to take the chance of wrecking. Although, I don't remember seeing anyone crash before. Still.

This will be the first year on my Harley. Always in the past I've been on a Honda, which was great, but it will be nice having more of a showpiece to ride in on. My bike gets lots of looks.

(Busplunge, JackeHammer and other smart-mouthed bloggers, don't even think about leaving any wisecracks about the size of my ... headlamp or saddle bags.)

POKING SOME FUN AT MICHAEL JACKSON AND HARRY POTTER

The world is all a-flutter with environmental (cap-and-trade) debates, celebrity deaths, political sex scandals, gubernatorial resignations, and pool-side racism. Only two of those are really news worthy in my opinion. So why not have some fun?

Top Ten Surprises at Michael Jackson's Funeral
My favorites include:

• Billie Jean sues for custody of the kids.
• Macaulay Culkin flown at half mast.
• A phalanx of zombies rise from the dead and dance.

Top Ten Harry Potter Porn Movie Titles
Again with my favs, but this time I won't quote them. I'll just give you the numbers and let you read them yourself. You know, porn and all, I'll keep it a bit more family friendly this go around. Numbers 9, 8, and 3 really do it for me.

Many thanks to the mayor of Top Ten-a-ville, Jason Rohrblogger, who constantly provides me with high-sterical fodder. What were your favorites?

SHOCKER! BIG 3 CAR MAKERS ONLY ONES ON 'AMERICA'S MOST OVERPRICED VEHICLES' LIST

According to Forbes.com which cars are the most overpriced? It will come as no surprise that the biggest failures come from the Big 3 Detroit automakers. The biggest offenders were:

• Jeep Liberty
• Dodge Ram 2500
• Chevrolet Trailblazer

No foreign brands make the list, as those automakers' cars tend to be priced fairly when considering supply and demand as well as their high rankings on consumer-satisfaction surveys.

COMIC CONVENTION TOMORROW

Springfield is having its Second Annual Comic Book Convention tomorrow (Sunday) from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. It is at the Lamplighter Inn North. (Last year I mistakenly went to the Lamplighter Inn South at Glenstone and Sunshine. Don't make the same mistake.)

It's pretty small, but I found a ton of great comics at very reasonable prices. In my experience, the small comic cons have been outstanding places to get great comics (toys, movies, etc.) at great prices. I often make bigger hauls there than the big cons. So don't let the size fool you.

NO BAGS REQUIRED

Today was the first time I went to the grocery store and did not use one single, solitary plastic grocery bag. Go environment! I've had the cloth bags for a long time now (months, actually) and I haven't used them for grocery shopping. I kept forgetting to put them in the van. Pitiful excuse isn't it?

I used my summer vacation to fold up all the cloth bags and put them into another cloth bag. Like it took any time at all. Eureka! Problem solved. It worked wonderfully. Now, if I can remember to put them back in the van before the next trip to the supermarket, I will be on a roll.

It felt good to be more globally aware. And as my good friend, Larry, over at Simple Thoughts of a Complex Mind will remind everyone: Environmentalism is not just a liberal thing. Good conservatives care about the environment, too. You may remember that Larry the conservative was recycling before I ever got on board.

Today, this progressive took another step toward conservation and caring by getting rid of the need for petroleum-based grocery bags.

DID RUPERT MURDOCK PURCHASE THE NEWS-LEADER?

I've heard it complained about that the local newspaper is liberal. One defunct blogger lamented the liberalness of the editorial board while he was a member. I read just one more article from an editorial board member and I can't fathom it. I keep wondering when it was that FOX News bought out Gannet?

DOES THE NEWSPAPER NOT CONSULT THEIR AP STYLEBOOK?

RE: Changes in parking places upset some

I stopped counting the number of times the reporter used the word "handicap". It caught my eye because I am certain the AP Stylebook specifically states not to use the word "handicap". I consulted the Internet.

I went first to AP Stylebook Online, but I don't have a membership any longer. That was ages ago. I did find "Beyond the AP Stylebook: Language and Usage for Reporters and Editors".

DISABLED" AND "DISABILITY" TERMS OF CHOICE
Most people involved in disability issues today see "disabled" or "disability" as terms of choice. Many want journalists to write "person with a disability" rather than "disabled person." A number of groups issue pamphlets explaining that the "person should come first." The terms "handicap" and "handicapped" have been used in much legislation concerning disabled people. During the 1960s and early 1970s, it was the word of choice. It fell into disrepute, however, when leaders of the disability rights movement insisted it was a term coined by special education professionals and not a term the movement chose. Today, most disability groups are changing the "handicap" in their titles to "disability."

It was 1987 that the AP Stylebook first had an entry under the heading of "handicapped". The word has been out for 20 years, so I am left wondering why she choose such language when her stylebook clearly states otherwise. What of the editors?

I CAN SEE ALASKA FROM MY RECLINER

Palin forgot her pledge to voters to fight for them and quit her job as governor earlier this week. The libs will see this as someone who cannot even finish what she starts, which is true. Conservatives will frame it as a move by a victimized pitbull with lipstick who is doing something unexpected. That's true too, I guess.

Nothing will change. I doubt it will affect anything. Repugs love her and libs don't. Sure makes for many headlines. Better not speculate as to why she did it. Otherwise it sounds like she might sue your rear end off.

EATING HEALTHY AFTER THE 4TH

I didn't do too bad over the holiday, food wise that is. Yesterday was a bit too carb-filled, and I'm sure I had too many dips (spinach dip, hummus, a touch of cheese dip) but for the most part I ate pretty well.

This evening I jumped right back to my daily regiment with a really refreshing and yummy veggie meal. I stole the idea from Dillon's but made it my own. Sorry, no pictures this time.

BAKED PORTABELLA PIZZAS
2 portabella mushroom caps
3 small Roma tomatoes
1/2 Vidalia onion
3-4 tbls minced garlic
Salt-free Greek seasoning
4 oz feta cheese

Finely chop the tomatoes and onion. Mix in garlic and seasoning. Set aside for 30 minutes. Top mushroom caps with mixture. Add feta cheese on top. Bake 20 minutes at 350 degrees.

It was delicious, healthy and nutritious. That's all I had for supper. I had some popcorn as a snack and called it done.

BIKERS STILL HAVE TO WEAR HELMETS

Gov. Nixon vetoed the motorcycle helmet repeal as cited in this News-Leader story. The reason cited was safety, specifically a study of Florida's motorcycle helmet repeal and the significant costs to taxpayers because of the repeal.

The release cited a national study that indicated the repeal of Florida's helmet law in 2002 caused medical costs for motorcycle riders with head injuries to double. The release further suggested that taxpayers wound up shouldering a "significant portion" of these increased costs, and said motorcycle fatalities in Florida "jumped sharply" after the repeal.

I surmise that Nixon chose the larger population's liberty (vast majority of taxpayers) as more important than a select few bikers who don't want to wear helmets because it is uncool.

It was the right move, but we weren't sure what Nixon would do. It's all over for now until the next legislative season when the Freedom of Road Riders try to do pass the legislation again.

GOODNESS, GRATIOUS, GREAT BALLS OF GEEKNESS

I had no idea Springfield was this cool (or nerdy depending on your viewpoint) but we have our very own free celebration of all things nerdy. Really. I'm not kidding. A real celebration of nerdom.

Picnic at the End of the Universe
A Celebration of the Geeky Arts
Sunday, July 19
11 am - 6 pm
Phelps Grove Park

It is an afternoon event for gadgeteers, gamers, geeks and fandom including: science fiction, fantasy, gaming, SCA, Linux gurus, Elmers (whatever that is), Makers (whoever they are), Mythbusters and merry pranksters of all sorts.

Hot dogs and hamburgers will be provided. You simply need to bring your own sides, drinks or desserts to share. The pavillion is reserved for the participants of nerdville. (Don't bring alcohol because it is not allowed in the park.)

Brought to the Ozarks by Eclectic Endeavors, a program of the Springfield Regional Arts Council.

HUZZAH! HUZZAH! HUZZAH!

We traveled to Muskogee, OK earlier this Spring for a Renaissance Festival and it was loads of turkey leg eating, wool tight wearing, fun. If you missed out then you have another chance this weekend and the next one.

4th Annual White Hart Renaissance Faire
5651 Highway F, Hartville, MO
July 3-5 & July 11-12
10 am - 6 pm
Adults: $10
Seniors: $8
Children: $6
Ages 5 & Younger: Free
417-741-9518

The RenFest is on rain or shine, so don't worry. You should consider it. It is much more fun than I realized. We enjoyed the day immensely when we went.

TRULY TASTELESS (BUT FUNNY) MICHAEL JACKSON JOKES

Has enough time passed? It has for me. I was a fan of the oft-accused boy-diddler's music when I was in sixth grade, but it was not long until I moved past his poppy tones to a more metal scene. I thought I had died and gone to heaven when I discovered AC/DC. Anywho ...

I offer, for your comic relief, some truly tasteless (but quite funny) jokes about Michael Jackson vis-a-vis Jason Rohrblogger's blog.

My favs:

• Michael Jackson hasn't been this stiff since Macaulay Culkin spent the night at Neverland Ranch.
• Rumors that Michael Jackson has died of a heart attack in his home are untrue. He actually died having a stroke in the children's ward.

HELLUVA WEEK FOR JEHOVAH

Click here to read Jason Rohrblogger's Top Ten Things Overheard in Heaven Last Week. Why? Because he's funny, that's why. And, I emailed JR and told him I needed something funny to post on my poor old blog. He obliged just fine. Ain't he a nice feller?

I can only hope that the best of scotch (aged 18 millennium) is readily available up there in the netherworlds. I wonder what shape the ice is? Can you grab your crotch in Heaven? I assume you can't diddle little boys.

WHAT’S IN YOUR PANTIES?

Michael Jackson, a pop icon alleged to have yanked the drawers off many a young lad, died. During that same time period the Supreme Court ruled the school-led strip search of the 13-year-old girl alleged to have ibuprofen concealed in her under britches was unconstitutional. You remember that story, don’t you?

Both situations pretty freaky if you ask me. You checked your tighty-whities lately?

By the way, I'm still wondering whatever happened to that LDS church-compound where all the child-brides and other youngsters were taken into custody? No follow-up as far as I can tell. I mention it just in case you haven't gotten your fill of child exploitation.

TWO MOVIES I WANT TO SEE

While watching movies in the theater today, we saw two trailers that made us take notice. M. Night Shyamalan’s THE LAST AIRBENDER and Tim Burton’s 9 both look really cool. (The links take you to the trailers.

The daughter and I have been watching Cartoon’s Network’s AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER on DVD and Netflix streaming. We really enjoy that animated television show. I think think the world of Tim Burton. 9 looks a bit dark, but his flicks are always worth watching. I could not help but think of the fellowship of the nine and I wonder if there are connections to Tolkien’s epic story.

MOVIE MADDNESS DURING OUR FAMILY VACATION

A nearly presidential-term spent in college (you can freely interpret that as unemployed) has wreaked havoc on our family finances to the point that we are running very low on the greenbacks. So our family vacation has consisted of staying home, eating in and watching movies on Netflix.

We did strike out today, during the heat of the day, and caught a double feature at the Hollywood downtown. Yesterday we watched KIT KITTREDGE: AN AMERICAN GIRL. Today we enjoyed LAND OF THE LOST and TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN.


KIT KITTREDGE: AN AMERICAN GIRL
I was quite surprised at KIT. It was about a girl but wasn’t really a girl movie. It was a depression-era story about a family that split up so they could survive. The father left town for work while the mother and daughter took on boarders. The townships hatred of hobos hit its zenith when there was a crime spree. Fortunately, the clever Kit and her friends solved the mystery and also changed people’s minds about those who are less fortunate. It was great. No wonder it was certified fresh from Rotten Maters.


LAND OF THE LOST
Well, there were no real surprises here. It was sporadically humorous and altogether ridiculous. That’s okay. It was supposed to be stupid, but we just were not that into it.


TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN
I saved this one for the end because I didn’t want it to stink up the rest of the page. Okay, it wasn’t that bad, but it was close. TRANSFORMERS 2 was fun for a summer movie, but the story was convoluted and once again the movie makers spent more time on the action and the CGI than they did the story. You’d think they would get that message by now. I’ll give you a quick run-down of the problems:

Numerous Resurrections
Who dies and is later resurrected? Megatron. Optimus Prime. The Matrix (the key). Optimus Prime again. You can only kill off characters or items and bring them back again so many times before everyone but the entirely idiotic and superficial will stay with you. Megatron was killed in movie numero uno. The Decepticons bring him back alive 40,000 fathoms beneath the ocean. Megatron then kills Optimus Prime; kills him dead. The military hauls him around and then our protagonist resurrects him using the Matrix (a key which also was destroyed but somehow magically resurrected in the nick of time). The Fallen then just walks up and steals the Matrix out of Optimus’ chest. Just like that. Doo dee doo. Optimus falls again and suffers greatly only to be resurrected through sacrifice by one of the ancient ones. Good grief. Is anyone actually falling for all that nonsense? Have the writers completely lost their minds? Does anyone have any idea what decent writing looks like?

Too Much of the Same
For the love of all that is holy and good, can we not make multiple fight scenes different? I love fighting and battles, but even I grew a bit weary at all the seemingly identical war scenes. It got boring.

The Transformers Don’t Look Like Vehicles
I’ve never liked the way the Transformers look when they are in robot form. Most barely resemble the vehicles they transform into. They also transform too quickly and don’t give us time to see the movement. That’s one of the coolest parts of the Transformers.

Where Were The Girl Transformers?
My daughter asked me why there weren’t any girl transformers? That because the creators were thinking only of boys when they made this flick. Apparently, they don’t think boys give a pittly dang about good story. So long as there is a pretty girl and lots of fighting we are happy. I’m here to tell you that’s not enough. There is no sense in alienating 50 percent of the population.

There were girl transformers. They showed up as motorcycles in the beginning, but that’s it. I suppose making girls would be too hard to believe?

An Transformers From Long Ago Was a Stealth Bomber?
Am I to believe that one of the oldest living transformers on the Earth, one that was here long ago is a stealth bomber. Wouldn’t he be a Model A or a prop plane at least? A stealth? No kidding? Um, do they not see a problem with that? He’s supposed to be very old. Stealth bombers are not that old. Duh.

Tomorrow, the wife and I are staying home and having a date day. The daughter is spending the day with her grandmother as part of her month-long birthday celebration. We shall watch SECRETS OF THE HEART and FANBOYS.

ARE STANDARDIZED TESTS REALLY ALL THAT BAD?

I'll leave you with this note before I head out on vacation.

One of my favorite educational sites asks the really hard (and interesting) questions. This month's pondering centers around standardized testing. You know, the bane of the educational system. Is it really as bad as all that?

I've wondered the same, but have kept it to myself thus far. Mostly because I just wasn't sure of the answer. The MAP (Missouri's standardized test) questions I've seen have been deeper, thicker questions.

The article cited above makes the case that our skill and drill tests, those of the memorize and regurgitate facts fare, occur more on the local classroom level than on state tests.

I CALL THAT A SUCCESS (EVEN IF IT IS A SMALL ONE)

I ate too much for dinner. I hate it when I do that. I've been starving to lose weight and when I pass a certain spot I no longer make good decisions. I was hot, tired and hungry after the garage sale. We cleaned up and I was famished. Too much so. We headed to my favorite local diner (Coyote's Adobe Cafe) for dinner. I had it in my head that I was getting wings, diet be damned.

But then, on the way there, I thought better of it. By the time we hit the parking lot at Adobe I had decided that a heaping plate of wings would taste good but would be such a bad choice. So I opted for a burrito filled with grilled chicken and fajita vegetables. I still ate waaaay too many chips and salsa, but I didn't get the wings.

I calculated it all on the iPod and I did go over my calories, but I don't claim to be perfect at all this eating business. On the good side, I had a veggie sub for lunch. That was a great choice and was more compliant with my fat doctor's requirements that I eat x-number of vegetarian meals per week.

IT'S AS HARD AS GOVERNMENT WORK

Garage sales make good money but they aren't nearly as much fun when you are in charge. Typically, Skinny Kitty takes care of the garage sales. I help out, move tables and talk to customers, but the wife and her mother are usually in charge. This time Skinny Kitty was out of town so it was left to the mother-in-law and me to handle.

Oh, that part was fine. We work well together.

But man, that garage sale business is hard work. We held it Thursday and Friday and when we closed today at 2 p.m. I had one and a half tubs of junk left. That's it. The rest sold. What I had left I donated to Goodwill.

I am surprised how much hard work running a garage sale is. I don't like waking up at 5:30 a.m. either. The daughter and I have grown accustomed to sleeping in during the summer. Oh, woe is me.

The wife jetted in from St. Louis today, got fed and gave her blessings. That's all good. I done good, but I hope she doesn't get used to it. I'm not a fan of running a garage sale. I prefer being a minor player in the whole affair.

FAT JACK THE BARBARIAN

When I was just a wee lad and watched CONAN THE BARBARIAN with Arnold Schwarzenegger I was transformed. He was so cool to my eyes. The video stores had just opened in my small town (that was back when the VHS-Beta debate was still raging) and I hunted down any tapes in the barbarian genre.

I went to my very handy dad and begged for a sword and battle axe. He constructed both for me, and I still have them. He also made me a shield, which I still own. I hunted down all manner of beast and evildoer in the land of Hollister, and the people revered me. I was awesome.

So yeah, I dig Conan. What am I to do with the recent news from Variety that there will be a CONAN rekick directed by Marcus Nispel who made THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE and FRIDAY THE 13TH remakes? Dare I even watch lest my childhood adventures be dashed to death? Nispel can't steal my beloved CONAN from me, nor my memories, but he could irritate me to no end.

Yet, I want to see it. If it is good, then I will be able to tap into those old memories and live out those adventures again. I'm danged if I do and danged if I don't.

ENJOY THE NUTSHELL

I have so many thoughts that I want to blog down and I just can't seem to muster the umpf to do it. I've been thinking about politics and religion and the environment and even sexism, but I just don't have the grapes. This will have to suffice.

• Politics: Extending the kind hand of Christ is not evil.
• Religion: Our local newspaper's Op/Ed page is too full of it.
• Discrimination: It is wrong ethically and religiously.
• Environment: It's not evil to care about our world. The spotted owl is significant. If you study even basic science then you will know why.

NETFLIX STREAMING MOVIES TO MY TV

It's better than pay-per-view. We have watched tons of movies this weekend, despite being so dadgum busy.

• Friday Night: Went to bed at 2 a.m. (I helped with the teens at our church lock-in.)
• Saturday Night: Got home at 9:30 p.m. after driving to Windsor, MO to watch my cousin's band play for 45 minutes. They were really good.

The quality is very good. Some are even in high def, which is extra nice. Most of the movies are older, but that's working for me. What have we streamed to our TV:

High School Musical 3
Peter and the Wolf (2008 Oscar, Best Animated Short)
Cloak & Dagger (a childhood favorite of mine)
Ghost Busters

I've also found several Black Belt theater flicks to watch when I need a bad chop sockey in the afternoon. I'm loving it. And now most of the movies sent to me are on Blu Ray, which is awesome. Go Netflix.

THE WORLD IS A DANDY SHADE OF BLU

I'm sure you are just on pins and needles wanting to find out what happened with our anniversary gift. Did Skinny Kitty approve of a Blu Ray or not? She thought the Blu Ray player (with Netflix hook-up) was a great idea. I did not go splat.

We hooked it up and streamed two different movies last night, just to test it all out. All the movies on my Instant Queue show up on my TV so I can choose the movies from there and can bypass the computer altogether. Very cool.

I went to Mediacom and switched out my cable box for one in HD. Also cool, although I think there is something wrong with that box. I have to switch it out, too. No biggie.

DON'T THINK TWICE; IT'S ALRIGHT

The first motorcycle I ever owned hit the streets today without my butt firmly planted. It sounded good as it pulled out of the driveway and I was a bit sentimental. Then I turned around and as I gazed upon the HOG sitting in my garage all sentimentality slipped away into oblivion.

It was a good bike, the Honda, and it never gave me a day of trouble. It was the perfect first motorcycle being all Goldilocks: not too big and not too small, but just right. I've moved on and so has she to a new owner who is as thrilled with it as I am my Harley. He's a teacher who needs cheap, reliable transportation to commute outside the county every day. She shall serve him well – very well – and I am happy to see her go into good hands.

Farewell my darling. Hello, my new (and much hotter) baby!

TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES

You could probably see this coming, as I am a gadget guy anyway. My DVD player started making crazy train sounds last night during our movie (THE WRESTLER). I had to turn the sound up just to hear the movie over the thing.

That is especially annoying with a new hi-def TV. So I am thinking that the wife and I need to buy ourselves a Blu Ray player for our anniversary. Makes sense, right? Might as well get the most use out of that 47-inch TV, don't you think? This is very logical and practical.

While I'm at it, I might as well buy one that is Netflix capable so I can stream the play-it-now movies straight to my television. My logic is sound. Feel free to convince her of this necessity by adding your comments of support below. (You can bet your sweet Aunt Minnie's fanny that I will delete any comments that serve to derail my plans.)

Will she go for it? Will my logical argument be met with acceptance or foot-downing and the counting to three? Will FAT JACK live to see another anniversary? Stay tuned for our next exciting episode:

FAT JACK GOES SPLAT
or
THE WORLD IS A DANDY SHADE OF BLU!

MOVIES

Skinny Kitty and I watched a movie last night, THE WRESTLER, and it was as tragically interesting as a stranded cow in a tree. No, it's not about wrestling, but about a man – a broken man, really – who traded the glory of the ring for everything else in his life.

Wow.

He limpingly tries to make up for lost time with his adult daughter, but his hopeless life screws that up once again and she puts an end to it all ... forever. There will be no more mulligans.

And so he heads to the ring once again. The ending has bothered some people, but I think the brilliance of it is lost in the fade to black. I don't really think it matters if he finished the Ram Jam or died in the process because his life is over either way. As his heart barely ticks, he climbs on top of the ropes in a last chance glory move. He is dead be it figuratively or literally after that.

The daughter and I went to see UP in 3-D at the Hollywood downtown. I love the Hollywood because it is never busy when I go so I don't stand in lines and don't feel rushed.

UP is takes its time and is not focused on action as much as fantastic storytelling. The 9-year-old gave it 5 stars, so there was plenty to keep her interested. Loved it. I don't care for 3-D because I have 3-D glasses over my glasses and that's uncomfortable. For me, it's just not important to the experience, but the kid digs it.

3 MORE POUNDS LOST

This week's weight loss was small compared to last week's 6.8 pound melting, but I celebrate any loss at all. I was really hungry that first week, but not so much so this week. I ate more than I was supposed to though, which shows in my weight loss.

I ate a big lunch and knew it once I stopped. My belly was full and I'm supposed to leave the table still feeling hungry. It takes 20 minutes or so for that full feeling to kick in. When I'm on a diet, it never really kicks in.

Tonight is a fruit, veggie, string cheese and bread meal. No meat for me and no ranch dipping either. I hope to counteract my big lunch. I didn't get to walk today so I'll have to walk extra tomorrow. The fat doc says 50-60 minutes of walking (any speed) a week. Period. I'm trying to hit or exceed that amount.

GRIN AND BEAR IT

That’s exactly what you do when your 9-year-old decides to have a slumber party for her birthday. Eight soon-to-be fourth graders can wreak havoc on a clean house and drive the pets insane, especially the cat, but it is worth it when that same daughter looks back on her life and remembers the year she had the best slumber party ever.

I kept reminding myself of the memories I was instilling in her spongy little brain as they … did … things … to … me.

No childhood slumber party is complete without scary movies, staying up late, and getting in trouble for being too loud after you are supposed to be asleep. Considering their age we opted for the Goosebumps series of just-scary-enough-to-be-spooky-but-not-enough-to-create-nightmares movies, which they watched in total darkness for the first half hour and with lights on the next hour or so.

After each activity the girls would get restless and goosy, so I often guided them toward fun things that had a purpose. Girls that age tend to argue about cliques and “she’s mean to me” if left to their own devices. So I gently suggested they do their nails. I put down towels but they still managed to spill nail polish remover on the old hardwood floor. Next time I will supervise the nail polish remover. (Note: nail polish remover bubbles the finish on the wood floors.)

Then I gave the girls facials. They loved that. I cut up cucumber and then applied lotion to their faces. I finished their eyes with the veggie. I took pictures but I didn’t want to post the kids’ faces on my site. Use your imagination.

Then the girls got a wild hair and decided to give me a facial and I agreed. Remember the memories you’re creating, Big Daddy. I plopped in a chair in the middle of the kitchen and let them cover my face with whipped cream and cucumbers, and I smiled at their giggles as they did it. It smelled awful, I tell you, but they enjoyed it. The daughter has managed to tell everyone she sees about it.

Of course I had to get on to them for staying up too late and having sleeping bag races across the kitchen floor. I knew that was going to happen before the party ever started. It’s part of the childhood experience. I am okay with that. I did my duty and settled them down. I think they went to sleep about 3 a.m.

I didn’t stop the dog from licking face after face at 7:30 in the morning. That’s all part of the experience, too.

UNEMPLOYED? CONSIDER THESE JOBS IF YOU DARE

I'm in the mood for something funny and disgusting. Why not? It's a cloudy summer Sunday. So I offer for your reading pleasure the 10 Bizarre Job-Related Illnesses from Cracked.com. May your chosen profession be kinder than those listed here.

OH, THE PLACES YOU’LL GO!

I’m already headed places, thank goodness, now that I’ve graduated with my master’s degree. I am looking forward to it all. For graduation, my parents bought me two gifts, one practical and one sentimental and I love them both.

The first was a new television. Funny story. Whenever my mother and wife send Dad and I out to buy something … well, there’s really no telling what we will come back with. That day my wife was at work and my mother was visiting friends in the hospital. So, she sent Dad and I out to pick out a new TV for our kitchen/dining room area. (I love to watch the news while I make breakfast for the girls.)

When we got to the store, Dad pointed out the silliness in buying a new LDC television for the kitchen when I have an old school TV in the one room we watch the most boob tube. I love his way of thinking. So we started looking at slightly larger sets down the big boy aisle, and we came home with a 47-inch widescreen big dog. Boy howdy can you watch movies and game on this puppy. There’s no longer glare on my TV. None. Zip. I can have every light on the house on and have no glare. It is a thing of beauty and we love every minute of it. Skinny Kitty is especially enamored with watching with insane hugeness her favorite jewelry craftsman, Jay King, on HSN.

The other gift, which came first, is equally worthy of blog space. My mother, with her artistic eye and infinite creative juices bought a slipcovered version of Dr. Seuss’ gradation book, Oh the Places You’ll Go! Inside, she scrap-booked on the pages using old greeting cards, thank you notes and other memorabilia. The result is a handmade book that I absolutely adore.

One particular page is very sentimental. My parents ran my high school Sunday School class. Two things I remember from the years they took on that endeavor: the biscuits and gravy and her mantra. Every story, every lesson, every unique teaching moment my mother impressed upon us teens this bit of ideology: God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things or a version thereof.

The point, of course, is that one person can make a difference and that regular old folks can be heroes and influential in the world around them. I like that message. I like the idea that heroes are really just ordinary people who have endured a journey in which they emerge from the other side as someone great.

Much obliged, parents, for the gifts and the lessons and most of all the love and support. (They have done a lot to help put me through school.) It definitely took a village to raise this child.

THANK GOODNESS I WALKED TODAY

Otherwise I would be over my daily caloric limit. Subtracting off the calories burned during the 30 minute walk (albeit a slow walk), I am coming in 18 calories under 2,300. Rock on. I even went without the Schwans ice cream pizza at my daughter's birthday party with the family. That's a big feat with me. I don't often turn down food.

I must admit … keeping track of my food and exercise does help me make better decisions. Just knowing that I have to put that food on my iPod makes me think twice (or thrice or more) about downing that sucker. That's the point, right?

Today I felt full, which makes me wonder if I added in all the food. I keep thinking "I can't be full. I must have screwed up somewhere. I shouldn't feel full on 2,300 calories. I even counted the three hushpuppies I scarfed while no one was looking.

A SERMON FROM THE FAT JACK MINISTRY

It is so easy and tempting to throw all fundamental Christians together in a big pot and stir them with the wooden spoon of condemnation all the while chanting: All pro-life Christians are violent; all pro-life Christians are haters.

The acts of the man who shot the controversial abortion doctor while at church serves as a great springboard to condemn all fundies. This liberal Christian is tempted as well, but it wouldn't be right.

Interestingly, many Christians do the same thing to Muslims. Idiotic voices constantly throw a barrage of editorials at our local newspaper disparaging all Muslims. because of the acts of some extremists. So does Rush Limbaugh and his parade of haters. It is human nature to categorize and label and fear. If Star Wars has taught us anything, it is that fear leads to hate.

Not all pro-life Christians support abortion clinic bombings or doctor killings. In fact, I will go out on a limb and say most do not. Although one study has found that Church goers are more likely to support torture. Not all Muslims are terrorists or America haters.

It's all a bunch of stereotypical fear-filled bunk.

If you are a Christian who ...

• supports torture
• believes in waterboarding
• takes the "kill them all and let God sort them out" mentality
• sweeps all Muslims up in one sandy pile
• supports the eradication of all Muslims
• supports deportation of all Muslims
  

then, perhaps, you should take to heart the lesson being presented to you now with this recent abortion doctor shooting. Jesus is peace and love.

For my atheist friends, and I do have several, then I would say to them to not be tempted to condemn all Christians for the idiocy of a few. Otherwise, you will be no better than Rush, Cheney, or the host of ignorant haters routinely published in the News-Leader. Not all followers of Christ support violence.

The Choir will now sing: Do You Call That Religion? Feel free to support my ministry as the baskets are passed around.

Amen and Amen.

THE STARVATION DIET

Not really, but it sure feels like it. I'm sure the children in Ethiopia might disagree with my use of the word "starvation". It's starving to me and it ain't pleasant, although my stomach is distended for other reasons that malnutrition.

It's been one week since beginning my weight loss regiment. In seven days of starving myself silly, I've managed to lose 6.8 pounds. I am not fond of my 2,300 calorie restriction. It leaves me feeling quite hungry most of the time. Such is life. I'll do it for as long as I can. Hopefully the stomach will shrink in size and I'll feel less hungry all the time.

Just so you know, I've gone over the 2,300 calorie goal almost every day and I've still lost weight. That's good. I'm still trying to meet my goal. That last time I really did this I lost 60 pounds using Jenny Craig. It worked, but I starved for a solid 8 months. It finally became too much. There's got to be a better way.

(In case you are wondering, I've also increased my exercise per fat doctor's instructions. I keep detailed records of every stinking morsel that passes my lips and all exercise routines I take. Thank goodness for the apps available for the iPod Touch.)

DADDY, WHAT'S A DOUCHE BAG?

Seriously? My nearly 9-year-old wants to know this? Okay, how are you going to handle this one, Big Daddy?

I took a deep breath,
and told her the truth
geared for a child.

She's heard some kids at school call each other that word and she wanted to know what it was. Understandable. I'm glad she had the guts to ask me. I'm glad I had the guts to tell her. She agreed that it is not a nice word and that we don't use it. I also told her that the act of douching is not healthy or natural and that our bodies clean themselves.

Now she knows and knowing is half the battle.

HOUSE OF JACK THROWS UP METAL HORNS IN HONOR OF GUITAR HERO WORLD TOUR

When I asked for Guitar Hero World Tour for Father’s Day, I had it in my mind that my daughter and I would play it over the summer. To date, the Wii has been a daddy-daughter activity. That is, until I got Guitar Hero for an early Dad's Day gift.

Skinny Kitty has found and embraced her inner gamer and it has been so much fun watching her and my daughter play. At times, we all play thanks to the fact that we have the ability to play lead guitar, bass guitar, drums and vocals all at the same time. The drums, by the way, are hard as heck.

We have had a hoot playing those old 80s and 90s songs Skinny Kitty and I grew up and went to college with.